Toad's Dimensional Rift

I have no raucous children
to interrupt my work

(only an insistent pug,
older family, & distant friends)

and like Handa-sensei
(of Barakamon fame)

to grow, I must learn to love
the interruptions

to flow with the energy
of life itself

open to the inspiration
to the moments

i would not have ever seen
if I slammed the door shut

and yelled
"You kids get off my lawn!"

(Oh how often do I wish to say that!)

but look!

a rhinoceros beetle!
 

<I am the author.  I posted this originally on wordpress.com on 4/13/2018.>

I offer this post in gratitude to Toho Studios & Legendary Pictures* for every single Godzilla film they have ever made or will ever make.  What I say in the following paragraphs may well irritate both Godzilla fans and Shinto practitioners. However, this is truly how I experience this character.  I cannot change that, no matter how hard I try. 

I have tried to be universally acceptable.  For decades. It doesn't work and editing oneself to please others isn't what Gojira teaches us, anyway.  So, I stopped trying.  And because I stopped trying to be the non-person who is always acceptable to others, I have become a lot more healthy in all ways.  And much more able to support others when they find they are struggling.  I cannot apologize for learning to be authentic from Gojira-sama.  (Yes, I know it means Lord Godzilla.  And yes, I feel he has a much higher rank than I do simply because he is, as a character or being - whichever, fully himself without apology.)

Whenever I watch one of these stories, my heart is reminded precisely what AWE is.  Not because these stories are always overly deep or the characters are always well-developed.  But because Gojira-sama is, to me, clearly a deity level figure.  Several of the movies allude to this fact.  Legendary's 2014 rendition makes it clear as crystal - "Godzilla - a god for all intents and purposes," so.  He is the wrath of Earth when the petty creatures we are destroy the balance of nature as thoughtlessly as we tend to - and for the stupidest of reasons, usually.

We act out of fear, greed, insecurity, paranoia.  Gojira-sama, I have noticed in all the films, seems to be motivated by instinct, as such, he is always true to himself.  We playact and lie in ways  big and small every day to get our way or even merely to just make life less difficult.  And most humans are offended when one does NOT do this.  You know what I'm talking about.

EXAMPLE:
FRIEND:  "Are you going to go to the club tonight with Jodie and the gang?"
YOU:  "Oh no.  I really wanted to, though."  (Your tone indicates something is off)
FRIEND: "What's wrong? I thought you two were close."
YOU: "Oh it's nothing.  I just scheduled my hair appointment for tonight."

We all know that if you said to your friend "Well, Jodie** has been consistently trying to convince to violate my ethics AND has been noticeably hitting on my boyfriend IN MY PRESENCE, so I'd really rather not spend time with her just now," a few things might happen.  The Friend might go tell Jodie, when you may or may not be ready to discuss those things with her yet.  The Friend might immediately defend Jodie and treat you like a traitor for having very valid concerns you had the AUDACITY to express honestly.  Or (very uncommon) the Friend might say,  "Those feelings sound difficult to navigate.  Do you need some company?  If not, I'll go on with the group because my favorite band is playing and I do not have those experiences with Jodie."  The first two possibilities are not helpful.  And are the most common human reactions to direct truth telling.

Godzilla doesn't ever do this. He is unstoppable in his truth.  And he reminds us to be the same.  We sacrifice even our own health to achieve imbalances so long as we believe they are in our favor.  He generally expresses profound irritation with this, often resulting in a good City Stomp.  I can't blame him.

How often have I wished to be that big and able to stomp my troubles at will!  I know many who feel the same.  I use a little Troubles Stomping Ritual when things get overwhelmingly out of hand emotionally for me.  I lay out papers with words describing my troubles and pretend I am Godzilla.  Quite a therapeutic practice.  Especially when paired with a nice loud screaming session.  Playing Godzilla reduces stress.  Even for so-called "Grown Ups."  (I'll tell you a secret - there's no such thing!)

Anyway.  To Toho Pictures:  Thank you from the core of my being.  The stories your creative teams have made over the many decades have taught me many things.

• To be true to myself.
• To seek right relation with all beings.
• To honor the earth as I honor myself.
• To find what the balance is, restore it, maintain it.
  [City Stomping optional.]

These lessons have saved me many times over, in many different ways.  I am forever in your debt.

*TriStar Pictures' very creditable *AMERICAN* monster movie, which was injudiciously (and possibly due to a desire to make a ton of money on Toho Studios' coattails) mis-named "Godzilla," is not included in this post's assessments, nor do I consider it canon.  [Though technically it is.] All comments to the contrary will be deleted.  I honor that you love it.  I do not love it.  I honor that it was likely the first "Godzilla" film you saw.  In hopes of giving you some joy, I direct your attention to "Them," "The Creature from the Black Lagoon," the modern satirical (and highly amusing) "The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra), the 1950s film "Red Planet Mars," and any other American monster or alien movies of the 1950s-1970s as examples of other great films you may enjoy.  Here is a list of vintage films you might like if TriStar's "Godzilla" is right up your alley!   https://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/best-old-horror-movies

**The Jodie mentioned in the example above is a completely imaginary person and I have never, nor will I ever, go clubbing.  I apologise to Jodie Whittaker, who's take on The Doctor I am seriously looking forward to experiencing, and who I was reading about only 30 minutes ago -- but no, the Jodie in this example is NOT the eminent actor from the UK who has taken on the mantle of The Doctor.  I promise.  And apologise for any offense perceived.